9 Table Etiquette Rules for Kids: Make Eating Out Fun Again!

You’d love to go out to eat as a family — let someone else do the cooking and clean-up for a change!

But you get there and somehow it becomes a chore. Cutting food into smaller pieces, older kids using sugar packets and ketchup bottles to play table football, the preschooler “finishing” after a mere three bites and leaving his seat to run around the dining room. You just want to eat your dinner. Like, sit and have a conversation, and get some food in your mouth fortheloveofpete.

Years ago, I heard a parent say, “All I want is a nice, family outing at my favorite restaurant. But it feels like I am herding cows to a feeding trough. Am I raising kids or cows? Can’t we enjoy one meal without having to open up 17 packets of ketchup? My kids need to learn good manners for restaurant dining.”

I totally get that. Does it sound familiar to you, too? Thank goodness, it’s never too late for children to learn restaurant table etiquette. Don’t think of it like etiquette rules… more like etiquette RULES!

Basic Table Etiquette RULES!

Here’s the rundown on what children need to know:

1. As soon as you sit down, put your napkin in your lap.

2. Don’t play with anything on the table — sweetener packages, salt, or pepper? Nope.

3. Never re-dip chips or vegetables into common bowls. It’s called “double dipping,” and — ew —  it’s really gross.

4. Please wait until everyone is served before you begin eating your meal.

5. Remember to use your best table manners — this includes elbows off the table, taking small bites of food and chewing with your mouth closed. Also, please chew and swallow before you talk. Nobody wants to see your food in your mouth while you eat. That’s why our family has a “no see-food” policy. (Get it? SEEfood?)

photo credits, creative commons: #4 beaulawrence, #5 Marina K Caprara

6. If you drop something, leave it on the floor. Move it only if it is in the aisle. This includes utensils — simply ask the waiter nicely for another one!

8. Ask for food to be passed to you rather than reaching. You don’t want to accidentally drag your sleeve — or hair! ew! — through someone else’s plate.

9. Always pass the salt and pepper together. They’re buddies like that. (And it keeps them from getting lost. Or crying.)

10. Don’t take a dirty plate to the buffet line. Use a clean one for a second helping. Yum yum!

Here are my hints for the adults in the family… What? You didn’t think I’d forgotten about us grown-ups, right?

Practice

Have practice dinners by pretending to be at a restaurant over dinner at home. The best way for parents to teach good manners is to model them! After you have taught, modeled and reinforced etiquette rules, reward them with a trip to their favorite restaurant! (And I don’t mean Chuck E. Cheese. Ahem.)

Be Firm

Remember that time you endured sitting near a table of someone else’s rowdy, unchecked children? Sometimes to avoid making a scene, parents overlook their child’s restaurant behavior. Trouble is, they’re already making a scene. Gently correct inappropriate actions right away and have a peaceful dinner!

Be Patient

Kids — especially younger ones — will make some manners mistakes. Hey, even I do from time to time. You’ll need to correct them, sometimes more than once. But getting angry or exasperated won’t make anyone feel good about being mannerly. Developing good manners is much like learning to ride a bicycle. You fall a few times before you ride on your own.

Most cowboys will tell you that once the cows learn the proper way to the trough, it doesn’t take as much herding the next time. Setting basic expectations for good table etiquette — and making them habits — will help your children develop manners become “polite kids” which will serve them throughout their lives.

Got a restaurant story to tell? Share it in the comments below!

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About Aubrey Hunt
Before hopping on the crazy ride we call motherhood, I studied engineering and taught math and science to middle and high school students. Now, perhaps like you, I fill my days singing The Itsy Bitsy Spider and praying my preschooler will eat a vegetable — any vegetable!