How to Raise Kids to Do Chores & Learn Discipline!

How to Raise Helpful Kids who Do Chores from https://smartkids101.com #chores #kids #jobs #allowance

Ask who wants to do chores and see how many hands go up. What… Nobody? Seriously?

While nobody likes them, they HAVE to be done. I’ve got clothes in the dryer that have been waiting to be folded for two days. (Did I really just admit that? Yes. Yes, I did.) Unfortunately, the Laundry Fairy hasn’t arrived yet. Wouldn’t that be nice?

The thing is, chores will always be around. My house, your house, our kids’ future homes. That’s right. The goal is that someday in the future (WAY in the future), they will go live in homes of their own.

So teaching our kids — girls and boys alike — how to do chores now doesn’t merely help our workload. It also sets them up for success in their future households.


Teaching Your Kids to Do Chores

1. First Get Them Moving and Motivated!

  • I look to my old friend and role model Mary Poppins for wisdom here. “In every job that must be done, there is an element of fun. You find the fun and SNAP the job’s a game!” So asking your children to clean their bathroom becomes “Who can get all the spots off his mirror first?” Tape off a square of tile on the floor and have your youngster sweep all the cereal bits into it. Stomp on cardboard boxes to flatten them for recycling. You get the idea… it’s ALL about the setup. Sneaky.

Find the fun and SNAP the job's a game. AKA, how to get kids to do chores. Find lots of ideas at https://smartkids101.com

  • Verbal cues will help get little ones started. You may find that older kids stay focused with chore charts or lists. You might have to try a few things, but once you find a system that works for your family,  stick with it. Which brings me to my next point…
  • Continuity is crucial when training young ones to be a helper. If you always expect the same thing, the expectation becomes the norm.

2. Set Good Expectations

There are lots of guides online for Age-Chore readiness. Check out our Pinterest board on Chores, Money, and Business for Kids for tons of helpful ideas.

To get you started, here are a few suggestions for each age range:

Ages 2-4

Start this age group with simple tasks like wiping up messes, putting away toys, and placing dirty clothes in a laundry hamper.  Personal hygiene like combing hair and brushing teeth (with supervision) are also appropriate.

Chores for kids Ages 2-4 Ideas Find more at the link from https://smartkids101.com

Ages 5-6

A big one at this age is keeping their rooms clean and toys tidy in common places. Getting the mail after school can be fun, and they should be able to wield a broom and dustpan without too much trouble (but obviously a little practice!). Have them learn how to set the table properly for every meal you eat together. And add more personal care expectations like putting on shoes and tying laces.

Chores Ages 5-6

Ages 7-9

Children this age should be able to feed family pets, help put away the groceries, and load the dishwasher. Have them pitch in with their laundry, teaching them to take responsibility for the clothes they wear. Brushing and flossing teeth unassisted is also expected for this age group.

Chores Ages 7-9

Ages 10-12

Pre-teens can easily be responsible for taking out the trash, sorting the recyclables, doing the dishes, and putting away the laundry. Have older kids help supervise younger ones as they’re learning to do chores. In the personal care category, we add showering regularly and (AHEM) applying deodorant daily.

Chores Ages 10-12

Ages 13 and up

In addition to all of the chores listed above, this age group can add simple meal preparation (and planning!), yard work and mowing, operating a washer and dryer, or cleaning a bathroom. Personal care includes all of the aforementioned and — if not already started — shaving.

 

Chores Ages 13 up

Remember, kids mature at different paces so you may need to tweak the above guidelines for your family. When they’re first starting out with a chore, they won’t do it perfectly. Reset your expectations to account for this. Take a deep breath and remember the point is not perfection, but rather to guide children to personal responsibility and helping others.

How to do less housework and have really awesome kids who help out -- simultaneously! https://smartkids101.com #chores #kids


3. How to Keep it Organized

This is my favorite part — and there are SO many ideas for chore charts and other organization. Our Pinterest board is a great collection of ideas, including:

  • Daily or weekly magnetic chore charts. You can keep a chart for each child and mix up the job distribution each week, or you can have children work together to complete a family chore chart. Make your own or use one like these Melissa and Doug Magnetic Chore Charts. (That’s an affiliate link.) It’s pretty inexpensive… we have it and love it!
  • For a different format, try a chore jar with popsicle sticks or slips of paper. Put in the weekly tasks and have them pull a couple of jobs each day — maybe extra ones if they need to “repay” you for poor behavior or want to earn a little more screen time.
  • A “Work for Hire” board is an awesome way to get those random tasks done, You know, the ones that aren’t on the chore charts because they don’t have to be done weekly — like washing bathroom mats or sweeping out the garage. Clip the chore to be completed to a dollar bill. Once the job is done, Mom or Dad inspects and doles out the cash!
  • The ChoreMonster App looks like a neat digital way to keep up with tasks to be done. It has fun bonuses for kids, like earning cute little “monsters,” and you can build-in your own rewards for kids to work towards.

Remember, the goal here is to encourage independence as kids grow. Whether you choose to do allowance or not, much of the chore thing is learning how to participate in and contribute to family life together. It will serve them well when they begin their own families in the future. (WAY in the future…)

Starting in childhood — as early as possible — lays a solid foundation for a lifetime of helping, serving, volunteering — generally thinking of others. And who wouldn’t want that?

Wishing a whole fleet of Laundry Fairies come your way!


READ NEXT: Top 10 Fun Activities for Kids

 

About Aubrey Hunt
Before hopping on the crazy ride we call motherhood, I studied engineering and taught math and science to middle and high school students. Now, perhaps like you, I fill my days singing The Itsy Bitsy Spider and praying my preschooler will eat a vegetable — any vegetable!

16 thoughts on “How to Raise Kids to Do Chores & Learn Discipline!”

  1. Brittnei says:

    I love love love how you have age appropriate chores in each section to give us an idea of what children of different age groups can do. My son has liked helping me clean for a long time now. He just turned 2. I let him help out with as much as he can for now. He tries to wipe things down sometimes even when I’m not lol. He helps with laundry and even thinks he can fold it. Thanks so much for sharing this with us at Countdown in Style!

    1. Aubrey Hunt says:

      Thanks for the comment! That’s so great that your little guy is so helpful (er, tries to be?)… that should make things easier in the long run, as he sees chores as just how to help out at home. Sometimes I wish I’d started earlier with my oldest, but better late than never!? (He’s only 4, I have to keep reminding myself. Haha.)

  2. Love this advice – especially the Mary Poppins tidbit:)

    1. Aubrey Hunt says:

      Thanks! Gotta love that Mary Poppins!

  3. Lots of good tips here to get things started. I’m actually writing an eBook about chores! My goal for my kids was that they could run the household by age 13, and they could!

    1. Aubrey Hunt says:

      Thanks! That’s really cool. When will it be coming out?

  4. Ruby Gems says:

    What a great post! I’ve pinned it so I can come back from time to time…as the kiddo’s grow up. I get more help from my daughter, but I know my son would love to destroy all cardboard boxes for me! 😉

    1. Aubrey Hunt says:

      Thanks! I’m so glad you found it helpful! 🙂

  5. Triplezmom says:

    Visiting from Type A Parent. I love this list of tips. Pinning!

    1. Aubrey Hunt says:

      Awesome! Thanks for the comment. 🙂

  6. April says:

    LOL! At least it hasn’t been sitting in the washer for two days! I hate it when I forget in there, because then I have to rewash! Starting early is really key. These are some great tips! We started using ChoreMonster and it’s been working well so far. It definitely incentivizes the chores without me having to make it fun! Thanks for sharing with Countdown in Style.

    1. Aubrey Hunt says:

      Oh yeah, clothes that have been sitting in the washer are the worst! Been there. Glad you like ChoreMonster! I hope it makes the whole process easier. I may have to switch to that from our magnetic chore chart, as it fell off the wall this week and the magnets scattered everywhere. Darn. Thanks for commenting!

  7. Julie says:

    My favourite bit of this whole post is at the end, don’t expect it to be perfect. You are so right. They will not do it how you would, I have literally bitten my tongue as my lads have ironed a shirt forgetting pretty much everything I showed them. It’s ok, they get better (ish) and they are learning how to look after themselves. With my greatly reduced expectations I find they all do a great job!

    1. Aubrey Hunt says:

      Isn’t it amazing how changing expectations makes a wonderful difference? And not just in chores. For me, the hard part is remembering to do it… or being willing to. Sounds like you are off to a GREAT start! 🙂

  8. Karren Haller says:

    FIrst of all, I sure wish they had blogging when I was raising my kids, I cant tell you how much what your doing has to be helping other parents with kids. There was nothing like this when my kids were growing up. Funny story, when my oldest son, had his first son, he said to me, “Now what do I do?” I said, “James, they don’t come with a handbook”. (Wish I had your site then)

    I also wanted to stop by and let you know, I wrote up a feature again on my Weekends Are Fun Blog Hop, on Oh My Heartsie Girl, come see what I said, hope you like.

    ~Have a great weekend, Karren Haller~

    1. Aubrey Hunt says:

      Oh, wow! Your words are beyond kind. Thank you so much for believing in what we are doing! A handbook for parenting would be nice — it sure is sweet that you consider our advice the next best thing. (We love encouraging other parents.) Sounds like your son considers your advice the next best thing, too! 🙂 Thanks so much for the feature.

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